Month: September 2004

  • okay, I had such great luck (primeva) with the offenbach piece that I have to ask…  does anyone remember a book length illustrated poem about a cat.  something about a bell with a cracked voice and the cat was named good fortune.  the line I remember is “out of pure joy good fortune died.”  anyone know the author??


    **update**



    thanks all!

  • babyjane is still really sick.  luckily I was able to drink myself into a state of artificial joy after she went to bed and sober up by her first hourly waking sometime around 1am.  that is my drinking strategy, by the way, to stay awake until I’m sober again.  it doesn’t take that long, really, and it’s sure worth it in the morning.  …especially when you only sleep in 45 minute bursts or have to leap out of bed when you hear the garbage truck (I didn’t make it).


    these m&ms are giving me heartburn, bleah.  I never get that!  hmm, I guess I do now.


    so a few minutes ago I was helping bjane blow her nose and when I was done she said, “there’s still some inside.”  I told her, “here’s a tissue, ” and, “you’re a big girl.  pick your own nose.”  and then I had a lovely stroll down memory lane, thinking about that old blue baby-booger snorker and how much fun it was to squonk a long oogy one up it “EWWWWWWW”  and then chase the kids around with it.  you can shoot them really far.


    ah, memories.


    oh yeah, I forgot… I did manage to get out today!  I had to go pick up emma at school.  guess who’s sick now!  oh, and THEN, dylan missed the bus.  see, if you wait, it just gets better and better.  WOW!

  • I’ve had the lines from an operetta stuck in my mind but I can’t remember which one.  it’s bugging me.  does this ring a bell?


    did you beat her choke her till you made her cry,
    did her father take a poker did he hit you in the eye…
    was she sad, were you bad, did he make you maaaaaad?


    yes?  no?


    ***update***


    Primeva she’s good for what ails ya!


    Jacques Offenbach’s comic opera, Lo jolie Parfumeuse
    the neighbors’ chorus:


    Please excuse us, mister, we don’t want to bother, we only want to know
    Why do you look so low? Give us all the lowdown,
    Did you reach a show-down with your last lady love?
    Did she keep you waiting, did she break your date?
    Please elucidate, please elaborate
    Did she treat you badly, was she very bad?
    Did she make you mad? Are you very sad?


    Was she a very rich man’s daughter
    Who showed that she was not all you thought her?
    When with your songs of love you sought her,
    Were you dowsed with water poured down from above?


    Did you beat her, try to choke her till you made her pout?
    Did her father take a poker, did he throw you out?
    Did you beat her and choke her and knock her all about? Ah!


    mmmmm… how fondly I remember singing this song!

  • Wu Tang Clan Financial



    X to the Z, c’mon get da money
    dolla dolla bill, y’all


    love me some dave_chappelle


    you gotta straighten out your priorites, n*****
    PROTECT YOUR FAMILY!

  • all mo betta now…


     


    INDIA.ARIE LYRICS

    “Get It Together”

    One shot to your heart without breaking your skin
    No one has the power to hurt you like your kin
    Kept it inside, didn’t tell no one else
    Didn’t even wanna admit it to yourself
    And now your chest burns and your back aches
    From 15 years of holding the pain
    And now you only have yourself to blame
    If you continue to live this way

    [Chorus:]
    Get it together
    You wanna heal your body
    You have to heal your heart
    Whatsoever you sow you will reap
    Get it together

    You can fly fly

    Dark future ahead of me
    That’s what they say
    I’d be starving if I ate all the lies they fed
    Cause I’ve been redeemed from your anguish and pain
    A miracle child I’m floating on a cloud
    Cause the words that come from your mouth
    You’re the first to hear
    Speak words of beauty and you will be there
    No matter what anybody says
    What matters most is what you think of yourself


    [Chorus]

    The choice is yours
    No matter what it is
    To choose life is to choose to forgive

    You don’t have to try
    To hurt him and break his pride
    So shake that weight off
    And you will be ready to fly

    One shot to your heart without breaking your skin
    No one has the power to hurt you like your friends
    Thought it will never change but as time moved on
    An ugly duckling grew up to be a swan
    And now your chest burns and your back aches
    Because now the years are showing up on your face
    But you’re never be happy
    And you’ll never be whole
    Until you see the beauty in growing old

    [Chorus]

  •  


    I was born one mornin’ when the sun didn’t shine
    Picked up a shovel and I walked to the mine
    I hauled Sixteen Tons of number 9 coal
    And the straw-boss said, “Well, bless my soul”


    You haul Sixteen Tons, whadaya get?
    Another day older and deeper in debt
    Saint Peter don’t you call me cause I can’t go
    I owe my soul to the company store

    See me comin’ better step aside
    A lot of men didn’t and a lot of men died
    I got one fist of iron and the other of steel
    And if the right one don’t get ya, the left one will

    ~tennessee ernie ford


    I’m not having suicidal ideation (where you actually think about how you would do it) so nobody blow a gasket.  I’ll get help.  I just gotta put this out in the universe… do you ever wish you weren’t here?  I start to wish I was dead, but then I can’t because of my kids, my mom, my sister, et. al.  too fucking responsible to kill myself.  I remember being really suicidal, ideation, plan and all, and it was the thought of my mom and sister that kept me from plunging right in.

    then paula called me and invited me to come party in oly for a week.  and I went.  I just recently told her that.  I hope she’s not sorry.

    yeah, yeah, boohoohoo, poor fucking me.  I have it good.  waah wahh, bad fucking pisces.

  • pass the bad mothering award over here…


    the girls spent the whole morning preparing their “play,”  setting it up and rehearsing, making signs and tickets.  I told them I’d attend as soon as I’d had a shower, cause, let’s face it… much as we love our kids, as sweet as the whole thing is, there’s still a measure of pure, unadulterated torture involved in such things.


    apparently the whole thing is set to “Sebastion Sings,” which is a spin off tape of The Little Mermaid.  for the first three songs, it consists of babyjane dancing while emma appears to sleep.  of course, babyjane can’t stay interested that long and comes to sit with me.  then diva-emma Can’t Go On and has a full-on spaz.  she won’t go forward and I know if we stop the day is ruined for everyone.


    and here I am, nearly catatonic myself, trying desperately to feign remote interest in ANY of it.  and I can’t really fault emma her paralyzed theatrics… I mean, that’s exactly my own m.o., now isn’t it?


    emma does the same things I did as a kid, saying something so quietly it can’t be heard, then when asked to repeat herself, with deep pain in her voice she sighs, “nothing…”   AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUGH!


    and what is it with the whole, I can’t hear anything YOU say the first time?  even though I am consciously ennunciating at a decent volume.  everything I say in the house has to be repeated, not because they can’t hear me but because they are not listening.


    and no one can speak to me without first saying, “mom?” even if I’m looking straight at them, even if we’ve been speaking moments before.  “mom?”  which requires, of course, a RESPONSE, and can I just say that lately every fucking word saps my spiralling energy?


    and the next time I am asked for a snack I swear to all that is holy, I WILL put my head in the oven.  fat lot of good it will do.  damned electric appliances.

  • I so can’t stay in a bad mood after watching zoolander…



    that Hansel… he is so hot right now… Hansel…


     

  • Vienna lyrics– Billy Joel


    Slow down you crazy child
    You’re so ambitious for a juvenile
    But then if you’re so smart tell me why
    You are still so afraid?

    Where’s the fire, what’s the hurry about?
    You better cool it off before you burn it out
    You got so much to do and only
    so many hours in a day

    But you know that when the truth is told
    That you can get what you want
    Or you an just get old
    You’re gonna kick off before you even get halfway through
    When will you realize…Vienna waits for you

    Slow down you’re doing fine
    You can’t be everything you want to be
    Before your time
    Although it’s so romantic on the borderline tonight
    Too bad but it’s the life you lead
    You’re so ahead of yourself
    That you forgot what you need
    Though you can see when you’re wrong
    But you know you can’t always see when you’re right

    You got your passion you got your pride
    But don’t you know only fools are satisfied?
    Dream on but don’t imagine they’ll all come true
    When will you realize
    Vienna waits for you

    Slow down you crazy child
    Take the phone off the hook
    And disappeaar for a while
    It’s alright you can afford to lose a day or two
    When will you realize…
    Vienna waits for you.

  • forecast:  rain


    after dinner I made it halfway through the dishes, broke out into a cold sweat, bolted two glasses of water, thought I was going to heave, then lay down and passed out for two hours.  niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice.


    thank maude for friends who call to see if I’m all right (thank you!), as I was in that kind of sleep paralysis mode where you can hear what’s going on but can’t wake.  I woke up to find babyjane asleep and feverish.  GREAT.  put her in bed.  homeworking the middler.  sent the trash out with the oldster.  dishes still not done.  but I am.


    single motherhood is usually fine.  sometimes it really bites.
    I think the doctor’s office forgot me.  no ab’s yet…
    consider my ass officially kicked.