Voulez-vous coucher avec moi
(dans cet endroit) ce soir?

where I was this weekend:

we had a dam good time BAHAHAHAHAHA…
yeah, I know.

I wasn’t aware that the Hoover Dam was in Arizona until we saw the sign informing us we were crossing back into Nevada.  I never claimed to be a rocket scientist, but I have to admit that felt like a new low even for me.

that’s really really tall.  really really.  I could only look into it for periods of about five seconds before I got intense vertigo.  KaiOaty informs me that Greyfox told her I died falling from a cliff in a previous life.  all the dreams I have where I die… yup, falling.  it was a really nifty place.  and there were chipmunks that looked like tiny easter bunnies.

I needed a nap before the show…  we saw circ du soleil, mystere.  WOW.  dinner was at a fab asian place.  mmmmmm…scallops.  I think I had only two kamakazis, which are my usual, but I was definitely feeling warm and fuzzy when waiting en queue for a cab back at the paris…

before The Man joined me in line, the boys behind me chatted me up a bit.  they had just been to a wedding and were on their way to the reception at a golf course.  they were trying to get me to go with them!  I told them I was old enough to be their babysitter, if not their mother.  highly flattering though… I should have slipped them a fiver.  good boys, here’s a cookie.

and they offerred to take our piccie:

awwwwwwwwwwwww.

I had the best time EVER.  you want to know something about this guy?  not only is he brilliant, hilarious, and fun to be with, but he knows how to treat a woman.  that’s not just rare, it’s unheard of.  and the sex was First Rate, so there you go.  it doesn’t get better than that.

it’s not the size that matters…

but whether or not you can make me sing.

and ooooooooo, baby…

there is no emoticon to express what I’m feeling.
…comic book store guy

what does a person see in you… is that a weird thing to want to know?  maybe I wonder because I’ve been the recipient of some really off the wall, out of the blue lines.  personally, if I’m not into somebody I’ll just run away.  I’ve had people search for me for years.  good luck!

let’s see, the last time it was the pod:  it’s just too hard to try to love you.

random guy before that:  you love me, don’t you?  yes.  why??

and that same guy:  sex is either dirty or boring.  (at least this was in general and not aimed at me in particular)

same guy’s sidekick who I also dated:  it’s not that I’m not attracted to you, it’s just that I don’t like you as a person.

thanks.

and when asked why he dated me in the first place, you know, if he didn’t LIKE me:  well when I met you I thought you were mysterious, but then I got to know you and found out that wasn’t true.

I want you to bear in mind that none of these men are retarded.

so yeah, I guess I have good reason to wonder.  I’m not good at asking that sort of thing though.  plus that’s not really on my mind when there might be an opportunity.  well, and I guess I don’t really talk about my feelings all that much.  I’m guess I’m just mysterious that way.  *raised eyebrow emoticon*

and I’d have gotten away with it too if it weren’t for those meddling kids!

I just took a nap.  now I may watch movies with impunity, late into the night.  it was the kind of nap where you don’t take off your scarf, shoes, or coat.  it was the kind of nap where you hear the kid screaming, “NO, NO, GET OFF MY HEAD!”  and all you can do is kind of turn your head to the side and bellow, “BLARG!  URBLE, URBLE!” until they stop.

the kids were lucky it was paula who woke me up next.  we ended with a one-up, who’s more disgusting contest.  I won.  it’s a dubious honor.  it’s also widely acknowleged that I have a way dirtier mind than anyone on earth (with certain obvious exceptions here at xanga).

we also discussed what we would have to do to have a detective agency in this small town.  where does one purchase one way glass and a marmot?

I couldn’t fool you forever!!

click here –> VeryModern
Full Moon Leo
Sextravaganza!!

wanna know why today was so fucked up?

here you go:  (chart for today)

and my venus makes a grand cross.

cedarling got me to thinking about my new Damien Rice album… playing it now.  it is soooooooooo goooooooooooood.  mmmmm… love it. 

many people I love (I guess three is many) in crisis today.  I’m spitted.  I want to fix it.  fix it all… but all I can seem to do is play delicate music that makes my chest ping.  not helpful. 

oh fuck me, I can’t go the gym with paula today, I have to do carpool to the skating rink.  urgh.  also I have to acquire a kid birthday prezzie.

Damien Rice, Cannonball

Still a little bit of your taste in my mouth
Still a little bit of you laced with my doubt
Still a little hard to say what’s going on

Still a little bit of your ghost your witness
Still a little BIT of your face I haven’t kissed
You step a little closer EACH DAY
Still I can’t SAY what’s going on

Stones taught me to fly
Love taught me to lie
Life taught me to die
So it’s not hard to fall
When you float like a cannonball

Still a little bit of your song in my ear
Still a little bit of your words I long to hear
You step a little closer TO ME
So close that I can’t see what’s going on

Stones taught me to fly
Love taught me to cry
So come on courage!
Teach me to be shy
‘Cause it’s not hard to fall
And I don’t WANNA scare her
It’s not hard to fall
And I don’t wanna lose
It’s not hard to grow
When you know that you just don’t know

there are some who call me… Tim?

paula and I have a new mantra (term not quite right but close enough):
shut up and do what I say!

I hope the munchkins are well enough to go to school tomorrow because I’m dragging paula to the gym (shut up and do what I say!).

no one at the gym threw off my groove yesterday, for which I was profoundly grateful.  I got a knowing smile from another middle-aged chub muffin, kind of a “you are my tribe” vibe.

I went into the video shop next door and got movies afterward.  there were three guys on the phone to (I assume) their wives getting their selections approved… bahahahaha!  I bought a packet of junior mints.  junior mints are my kryptonite.

remember a few months ago when everyone was posting pictures of their cleavage?  I never did because it just didn’t happen spontaneously for me, but you never know, I might.  anyway, I think everyone should post boob pics again.  now.  okay… NOW.

shut up and do what I say!

I was talking on the phone to Paula this morning…  right at the end as it was wrapping up we said at the same time:

“I have to go to the gym”  “I have to lie down”

and then we had to laugh till we died.

I keep trying to wear nice underwear but then it feels all oogie and I have to change into my fugly old ones.  the nice stuff practically gives me seizures.  I can just tell I’ll be pulling at them all day.  I made it three whole minutes before changing this morning. 

well, I’m going to the gym but I’m wearing “don’t talk to me; we have nothing in common clothes.”  these include the required trainers and track pants but also a tee shirt with a picture of the enterprise.  oh and my mom says I look rotten with my hair in a ponytail, so I make sure to do that too.  gym people scare me.

added bonus:  wearing the bra with a missing hook.  possible hilarity to ensue.