Month: January 2008

  • that Fodon

    she just keeps getting older and older

    birthdayfodon

    I really, really like her.

  • wouldn’t take nothin’ for my journey now

    my great aunt died last night while my mom and I were watching Sweeney Todd. I feel vaguely guilty that we were peering through our fingers at spurting jugulars when Aunt Kibby drew her last breath. she was horribly ill, ostioporosis ate away her spine and her shoulder, so it really was a kindness– death, that is.

    the power went out just after I started this. it’s only three houses. sigh. the p.u.d. says it should be back on in a half hour or so. one of the houses belongs to one of their linemen. the other house belongs to a detective for the sheriff’s office. not that it matters.

    my daughter is feeling sick. she’s on the sofa with the barf bucket next to her. sigh.

    the power’s back on. whew.

    when I was a kid my dad used to spank me with a wooden yardstick. if I didn’t cry he would spank harder. if I cried too much or too soon he would say, “I’ll give you something to cry about.” once he broke the yardstick on me.

    when I was nine I moved to a new school and for three months or so I was the class pariah. they bullied me incessantly and the teacher treated me like a moron. I faked sick so many times that I was sent to school with aspergum (gum that releases aspirin, I don’t suppose that they have that anymore) and was told to buck up.

    as the result of these two things I internalized a way of relating to the rest of humanity: you must be extremely vigilant about analyzing your environment and carefully tailor all your outward affect and action in order to manipulate the reactions of everyone. or what? they’d extinguish me. I also learned (not that it’s necessarily true) that people are either bullies, fearful of bullies, or indifferent. eventually I learned to value true kindness and loyalty, not that there’s a lot of it out there. still there is some.

    I learned to people please but not because I care what they think about me. I assume they’ll think bad things about me if it’s what they want to think. I just want to keep them from trying to actively hurt me. it’s survival not vanity. I like myself. I think well enough of myself, well enough to protect myself.

    when my children cry sometimes it irritates me. I have to try so very hard to temper my natural, conditioned reactions with compassion. it makes me very sad when I feel I identify with my own former oppressors by reacting that way. no matter how happy I am, I find that sadness is not far away. I’d like to recover to the point where that’s not true, but I don’t think that’s likely to happen given my genuine temperament. I try to be okay with that.

  • my kid’s english project (Dylan)

  • by Maya Angelou

    Phenomenal Woman

    Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
    I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
    But when I start to tell them,
    They think I’m telling lies.
    I say,
    It’s in the reach of my arms
    The span of my hips,
    The stride of my step,
    The curl of my lips.
    I’m a woman
    Phenomenally.
    Phenomenal woman,
    That’s me.

    I walk into a room
    Just as cool as you please,
    And to a man,
    The fellows stand or
    Fall down on their knees.
    Then they swarm around me,
    A hive of honey bees.
    I say,
    It’s the fire in my eyes,
    And the flash of my teeth,
    The swing in my waist,
    And the joy in my feet.
    I’m a woman
    Phenomenally.
    Phenomenal woman,
    That’s me.

    Men themselves have wondered
    What they see in me.
    They try so much
    But they can’t touch
    My inner mystery.
    When I try to show them
    They say they still can’t see.
    I say,
    It’s in the arch of my back,
    The sun of my smile,
    The ride of my breasts,
    The grace of my style.
    I’m a woman

    Phenomenally.
    Phenomenal woman,
    That’s me.

    Now you understand
    Just why my head’s not bowed.
    I don’t shout or jump about
    Or have to talk real loud.
    When you see me passing
    It ought to make you proud.
    I say,
    It’s in the click of my heels,
    The bend of my hair,
    the palm of my hand,
    The need of my care,
    ‘Cause I’m a woman
    Phenomenally.
    Phenomenal woman,
    That’s me.

    Maya Angelou

    I need to read this occasionally.

  • Women and the etiquette of hats in public

    Women required to remove hats in courtroom

    The article so perturbed me that I sent this email:

    Judge Hollenbeck,

    Etiquette rules have never required women to remove their hats in situations where men may be expected to. Women covering their heads has always been a sign of obeisance and respect even as men are required to go bare-headed. God does not require women to remove their hats in his house of worship. I respectfully submit that it is presumptuous to expect more.

    Requirements must allow people to follow the tenets of their religion, such as covering one’s head in public. Exceptions would have to be made. I think one such exception should have been Ms. Williams, the woman with cancer. I think it is terrible that your court rules forced Ms. Williams to choose between supporting her child and keeping her dignity.

    Sincerely,
    Lara X. Xxxxxx
    Xxxxxxxxx

    (I live in a neighboring county in the same state) What do YOU think?

  • life is more fun when I pretend

    my step-dad is fishing in Argentina. I thought about it and I decided I’m not going to tell my mom about this:
    Airlines Crap in Argentina
    I think it would only serve to worry her when there’s nothing she can do. also, papaJohn is an extremely resourceful person and he’s nearly impossible to rattle. I’m sure he’ll be fine with whatever happens.

    in other news: I went to the gym. and it was less than a week since I last went. and I’d been the week before that. and I enjoyed myself. put that in your back pocket.

  • cherchez la madman

    oh my god… I do so love this…

  • cleaning rugs with snow

    I was thinking about this today. I think I remember it from some book I read as a kid, probably either A. E. Rolvaag’s Giants in the Earth or some Laura Ingalls Wilder tome. So I looked it up on the internet:
    cleaning rugs with snow
    yep, just how I remembered.
    ***edited to add– I don’t want to frighten anyone; I wasn’t actually cleaning anything. I just noticed the effect of brushing powder off my suede boots and this came to mind.

  • Wishing you a happy and preposterous new year

    I just looked at the local paper online to see if it says if the grocery stores are open (it doesn’t) and came across a very interesting (to me) news item. It’s about a man who drove an entire block on the wrong side of the main drag before running into a light pole. The article said it was near midnight and he had minimal alcohol in his blood.

    The whole thing was pretty well written but the last bit really tickled me:

    When police asked the man what caused the accident, his one-word answer was “pterodactyl,” Smith said.

    A pterodactyl was a winged reptile that lived more than 65 million years ago. The man was driving a 1994 Cadillac DeVille.

    He was treated and released at [redacted], hospital officials said this morning.