| Dear Fucking Diary,
Today I ate a cookie for breakfast. It's already past noon and I haven't killed, maimed, or gravely injured anyone.
S. |
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| something beautiful.
well, fucking fuckity fuck fuck fuck. I broke up with him yet again and I've got to stay clear. this is nuts.
I don't ever remember wanting so much to punch someone in the face.
I'm tired of dating people that don't even LIKE me. never actually did. I think I'm the one that throws the fog over it. I've got to stop doing that. if only I could remember that charming is something a person does, not something they are.
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BabyJane's ninth birthday at Bella's. |
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| sometimes moments of clarity are uplifting; sometimes they're just clarity.
I just had a flash where I understood beliefs/hope/fantasy are what keep us going and doing what has to be done. in reality you never reach the top of the hill. the cavalry never comes. the man "of your dreams" is only invested enough to do what it takes to make sure you don't leave. he thinks your ass is nothing special and there might be a better ass around the corner some day.
as I wrote on my pee-chee in high school: life is a sucking, swirling eddy of despair, punctuated by small moments of false hope in an ever-darkening universe. [quote is of unknown origin, mid-80's]
god, I fucking hate it that the default setting is 'publish to facebook.' motherfucking fucker. I had a nice time shouting at the computer for several seconds. |
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Lifetime
