September 24, 2004
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still nothing new on brian yet, but I should hear back about his surgery this evening, I hope. his dad’s back. that’s good.
last night was a dark night of the soul. I’d actually been quite centered about the other crap going on, but it was parenting and patience that were my fall. I have been stuck in the house with sick children for over two weeks now. there’s been the flu, a horrible flu-ish cold, and now pink-eye. add to that my own kidney infection and the fact that I’m premonsteral, wow, what a cooker.
everybody’s been snarky and I’ve been trying to stay even. I’ve got The Sulker, The Crier, and A Mighty Whinge. these people who are horribly sick can sure trash a room with amazing speed and then be “too sick” to put the things back. oh, and add that the Whinge has taken to waking me up every hour on the hour during the night to say, “I can’t sleep.” or I hear someone coughing… can you say One Half-cocked Insane Motherfucker?
so last night I bellowed at EVERYONE.
I HAVE HAD IT!!!
I AM AT THE END OF MY TETHER!!!
I HAVE HAD IT WITH YOU PEOPLE!!!
and maude help me, I think I said, “I hate you all…” though I muttered it very lowly and don’t actually think they heard me. and BELIEVE me, after that I was shocked back to reality, apologized for yelling, and put them all to bed, where they were warned to STAY.
I had also called my mother early in the day to tell her I needed some help or I was going to snap… and she hadn’t called me back as of the time of said snappage. she says she may be able to watch the kids while I get out for a few hours (I desperately want to see Sky Captain and the Somethingorother of Tomorrow). but of course, she also had to say that I would be much better rested if I put the children to bed at a decent hour like she had done with us. wtf?? I put the kids to bed the same time she put us to bed. so many people seem to have these ideas about me they gleaned completely out of the air. it’s really messed up.
holy moly, what a night… but they did leave me alone overnight and I got about six hours. whew.
Comments (14)
ESCAPE!! ESCAPE!!
Goodness, sick kids wear us down. I hope you find some solitude soon!
After all of that you deserve a week off…. I’ll try to send some healing energy your way too… Get well soon… And don’t forget to tell me how the movie was…
have to echo your “wtf?”
bag that sniping shit and help please. grrr.
hope you get some positive word on Brian soon.
Good thoughts going your way in spades – for Brian, for your kids, and most of all for you!
Things are not right in the world when they’re not right with you.
Anxiously awaiting good news on Brian, and you know, I sleep with my cellphone next to my head, if you feel the need to vent
Don’t you just love parent’s some times?
Backhanded remarks…of course maybe it’s payback for nagging them when they were sick as well?
Either way, I’m sorry. I really am, and I hope ya’ll feel better soon.
I read that and just thought “wow. wow. I’m never having kids”.
I’m sorry, muffin! I wish they sold sleep in a bottle, I would buy you some. Do something nice for yourself–massage? candy?
Sorry.
I haven’t been around here lately. I hope your step brother is alright. Sending all the extra vibes I can muster & some for you to. Sounds like *you* need some.
we just have the one (so far) and there are days I have just fucking had it. and I let EVERYONE know.
get some rest, try anyway
Aaaaaaaargh! ((((((((((((Satori))))))))))
I burned the candle anyways, and have been thinking about him today, hope you hear something, and tell your mother to go soak her head! Geeeesh!
-M
damn, best wishes to your brian! and, well, also to your brain! i think some more solitude is in order, that really was the best word for it, so i’m stealing it ;D
mmmm….snappage. you’re a queen to have kept it together that long, i’m thinking. be well.