April 2, 2008
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the telemarketer
at the end of his spiel, the one where he called me “Lisa, er Lara,” I stopped him and said “thank you, but I’m not interested. I’d like to give you a piece of unsolicited advice, tho, and I really mean to be helpful: I’m a middle-aged woman and I hate being called ma’am. it reminds me that I’m old. most of my middle-aged friends hate it too. just something to consider.” him: nothing. me: bye!
I’m a dick, but I felt like saying it. I should probably just hang up in the first place but it feels so rude.
Comments (10)
No, it’s totally true. I hate being called ma’am and I’m 22. I didn’t mean for that to rhyme.
Telemarketers usually can’t say my last name so I know immediately who they are and I start my conversation with, “I’m sorry but I never accept phone solicitations”. They then usually apologize and we hang up. I don’t know why, but I just don’t feel like a dick doing it. I feel invaded when I get calls like that. But the ma’am thing… I hate it too.
You’re not middle-aged, ma’am.
After living in the kinda-south, I’m used to ma’am. Everyone says it and it’s kind of nice, really. I got used to using it as well. Everyone is ma’am to me now. Unless you’re a sir.
But, regardless, if someone calls you to sale something, I think you can say what ever you want to them in return. They’re calling you and invading your phone space. You can take it back. If you want to give a nice suggestion, that’s cool.
My best reaction to a telemarketer was in college. I was reading out loud a paper that I had written for class to my friend, for suggestions, when my phone rang. Telemarketer. Who wouldn’t let me get a world in edge-wise to say no thanks, my friend kept saying “hang up”. Instead. I began reading my paper (which was about war crimes committed by the Japanese during WWII) out loud again. The person stopped dead in their sentence as I read some line about living dissections of babies.
They hung up on me.
I need to find that paper and keep it around for some other time….
do not call me ma’am or you will lose an eyeball.
i think you behaved very decently. i usually just hang up, though i haven’t always done that. it must be because i am getting older.
call me ma’am god damnit!
Actually, if they have a call quota to fill, you’re doing them a favor by hanging up.
…well, at least that’s what I reassure myself with. That, and they can’t pronounce my four-letter last name. That helps me feel less bad about hanging up too.
uhm….I say ma’am only because it’s something I learned here in Texas…even though I don’t have any Southern accent nor sound anything near like a “typical Texan” (or whatever people think it is) it’s just something I was raised to say….not defending him, but I get ya…
kinda reminds me when an older gentleman at work kept calling me “sir”…I asked him:
Me: “Sir, how old are you?”
Him: “I’m 64.”
Me: “Okay, I’ll call YOU sir for the remainder of this call…sound good?”
Him:(laughs)
and thanks…things are almost fixed…
I hate the whole ma’am thing, too. I’m 39 and it’s exactly as you say – it makes me feel old. I don’t know exactly when I left the sprightly world of “miss” and sunk into the morass that is “ma’am”. *sigh*
When I was about seventeen or eighteen I would watch the office for my parent’s travel company. They specialized in creating tours for mostly retired people. From the time I was nine I was taking people all around the country and a few countries in europe. I’d say that ninety percent or better knew me very well as I did them. However, there were many times when they would call the office and when I answered the phone they would respond with, “Nancy?” to which I would say, no this is Tim. “Baxter?” No, this is Tim… you remember we went to Yellowstone together last May.
*lightbulb*
“Oh Timmy, you sound just like your mother!” Yeah, great thing for a teenage boy to hear. Repeatedly.
I now, however, thrive on feeling old. Whenever someone has a question and I have the answer, they look at me like I have the teacher’s edition of the text book or something and I reply, “It’s because I’m old.”
I have not, though, been called ma’am in a number of years. Huh.
i HATE being called “ma-am!”
Seriously, no matter how old a woman is, you ALWAYS call her “miss.” The young ones won’t flinch and the older ladies will get a kick out of it. Good for you!