September 21, 2003
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when I was a kid, grade school, I found math VERY challenging.
I went to great lengths to conceal my shortcomings…counting on my fingers to add and subtract, using reasoning rather than formulas in story problems. triangulating, and as a last resort, using the “what did you get for number four?” method.
this was exacerbated by a stressful homelife and switching schools several times.
in other areas I excelled. my art and music skills were tops. I was in the highest reading group, and did well in science, though sometimes the math factor held me back. I was pegged as an english whiz/math moron.
that could have gone on…forever? what happened to change it? we were having those timed multiplication/division tests, the tests I dreaded. every day. what a horror. three times five? quick add three fives and write it down. 15 divided by three? add threes until you get fifteen…count them. my grandad noticed, and he didn’t let me do ANYTHING until I had memorized the charts. he wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom until I got all the fives.
we did it in one day.
and within a year, I was in excellerated math. I wasn’t a dummy anymore.
still, in junior high, I started to bog down…I liked math better, but I still couldn’t process all the algebra. geometry was a dream. proofs? yummy. I made it into high school in the lower half of the gifted math program.
then I got a tutor. one who could tell me WHY you move this number over here. as it turns out, I couldn’t remember how to do something if I didn’t understand WHY it needed to be done. that geeky brilliant boy gave me the keys to the numerical universe that day he explained the quadratic equation. it all came together. like music. like sex. an epiphany of unequalled emotion…to this day.
I never did scale the math heights…it turns out I don’t really like school much. but I tested out in the 98th percentile in the state in math…higher than the other subjects I excelled in, though I did well in those too (I’ll try not to brag).
so, I didn’t turn out to be another einstein…but I’m no dummer either. and I get it. and it’s beautiful.
Comments (22)
beautiful post.
You’re beautiful.
You know, I was some kind of math whiz when I was about 5 till I was maybe 10, then it started to break down. When I got to high school, I ended up bailing out of traditional math and taking a computer science course just to get a math credit. I never understood exactly why things fell apart . . . but the way you put it here, i.e., wanting to know why this or that happens, had a lot to do with it, I think. And I still don’t know why. So congratulations
.
I slaved for years over sines, logarithms and tangents. I looked up figures in books. I never understood what they were or what they were for. Do you know?
Beautiful post
god you make me so hot
come count with me baby, i’ve got ten little piggies dying to be counted
Tara has terrible trouble with those timed math tests too, and they’re still on addition and subtraction. Won’t be but a couple of months before multiplication and division start. What method, other than the torture of having to piss, did your grandad use that actually helped??
M…I answered in your guestbook.
I was the exact same way. I made it through elementary school math based on memorization and high school math based on the teacher marking you for “showing your work” I usually got the first few steps right and fucked up the answer towards the end.
I love that photo.
kewl!
I was reading before kindergarten and so they ‘knew’ I knew and made me take an advanced course throughout. About that same time my parents taught me to tie my shoes and learn the multiplication tables inside the pee-chee folder…I remember that evening. I will always remember that evening.
All was well until I took the state placement test prior to entering high school. They said the results showed that I could start out in algebra (when I hadn’t a clue what it was nor had I taken any pre-algebra courses). Things went somewhat okay that year as I did fairly well without really knowing why. The following year geometry had me doubly confused but not flailing. By my Junior year I was listening intently to the lesson of my algebra II teacher, asking questions after class, pouring over the work at night, asking my befuddled parents for assistance, then going in the next morning before class and asking the teacher to go over it again so I could understand it. I did this every day. By the time we got to the mid-term, I was fairly certain I bombed the test like I had the class thus far…I came away with a D, which I’m certain the teacher gave me out of pity because he knew how hard I was trying. I dropped the class and took something else…but I never did understand numbers. Years later it’s funny the way in which I approached codes and computers…I didn’t really allow the numbers to take that big a role and would look at the problems from a different aspect; a different point of view.
I never did slay the mathematics beast that was my bane…I simply learned to live without it, so to speak. I congratulate you on your accomplishment, regardless of the fact of whether you did anything with it once the skill was acquired.
BTW…I can still tie my own shoes.
I’m pretty good with the basic stuff. When it moves into Algebra though… watch out… I’m a mess. I’ve got a 3.8 GPA… it would be a 4.0 if not for MATH! Curse you foul math gods!
(and Biology… curse that too!)
I had a similar experience– the times tables and rote memorization were my bane, so math left me with a bad taste. Only later when I finally applied myself to it and realized the mechanics of algebra, formulas, etc, did I come to terms (ahem) with math.
ps yes it *is* beautiful. elegant!
the end
ah, a gifted teacher – the best thing that can happen to a gifted student. knowing how to teach, not just what to teach, can make or break a kid. and sadly, most people don’t know how to teach. even if you didn’t ultimately use your understanding, you came away with the knowledge that you can get it, and that makes so much of a difference.
i’m emailing tim now; i hope he can teach me to tie my shoes.
I suck. I still suck. Booo… hahah
Actually I was the same. I HATED math. I think I still do, but Calculators are everywhere now, EVEN on my cell phone. BONUS!
wow, i wish i would have had someone like you to relate to and influence me regarding my own “mathlessness”! i still DON’T GET IT… yet somehow believe i’m cool by singing:
“…and if ya wanna make sense, what cha lookin’ at me for? i’m no good at math…”
the “anal” b.a. english grad in me says, “-and apparently, you didn’t do so well in english, either, fiona!” but fuck my “grammar bitch!” fiona apple is a lyrical goddess, with or without the math skills!
I remember never being challenged by things like math, or words, or spelling… but I do remember having a hard time with tying my shoes or telling time, or riding a bike. I was great with my mind, but working with the outside world was always a problem with me. I’m starting to get the hang of it.
I need a math tutor like that! I’ve taken all my math classes at least twice! uck. When I consider going back for a higher degree, I always consider how much math I’ll have to retake and then give up. Sad isn’t it?
You know I would never mistake you for anything but brilliant.
I was all “Me too, me too” until you finally got it. I still don’t get it. Wish I’d gotten a tutor.
-M
You know, I have the exact same problem with anything I learn. If noone takes the time to explain to me (or I can’t work out on my own) the reason behind the thousands of little factoids that make a subject it just goes in one ear and out the other.
Personally I’ve always kinda thought of you as the female Einstein, except you’re not European and you comb your hair. Also, you don’t sleep with as many Russian spies as Einstein did…
UGH …MATH, zero challenged overall to me, but VERY VERY BORING…. Nothing I have ever enjoyed no matter how good I was at it