October 28, 2003
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Northern Flicker
we have the most beautiful woodpeckers around our house right now. apparently they’re called flickers. they’ve been rooting around in the hillside out my kitchen window. they’re absolutely gorgeous, and I’m fascinated with them. pictured above is the male who’s flashier (flickerier?). both sexes have these magnificent scarlet wings, the underside, that is.
driving back from my first morning foray (I have two), I noticed one standing near the top of our road. as I got nearer, I marvelled at its fearlessness; it didn’t fly away as I approached. when I drove within a foot of it, a realization clicked, oh shit, it’s probably in shock, injured. I stopped and looked back.
not long ago, and for most of my life, I would have run home and gotten a box, lined it with warm fabric, and put the bird in it. I would have tried to help it…and the bird would have died anyway. my thought was always: but it might not.
this time, I slowly stepped on the gas, and went home. the bird was either going to make it, or it wasn’t. my helping it would just stress it out in another way. if it was going to make it, it was going to need to do it on its own. that’s nature. that’s life. and that’s the way it’s supposed to work. it is the kinder way.
sometimes compassion is stepping back and realizing it’s not your work to do. sometimes love is all you have to offer, and sometimes love is hands off.
sometimes that’s what you have to do for the people in your life.
sadder but wiser.
Comments (27)
It’s a tough lesson but one worth learning if one is the least bit interested in inner peace and harmony.
I thought it said Northern Fucker! I need glasses.
ah, wise lessons the birdies teach.
and i love me some flickers. they laugh – chuckchuckchuck.
Oh, I don’t know. I would still stop and see if there’s anything I can do. I do understand, though. When you live amongst animals, sometimes you become overwhelmed and need to stop taking responsibility for everything because it threatens your sanity.
When we were in CapeTown just now, M noticed a sea gull on a busy road, dancing like crazy. At first he thought:damn, these birds are fearless ! Then he noticed a transparent nylon thread tangled in the wings. He stopped the car and despite the bird’s aggressiveness, set it free.
Sometimes, that’s all you have to do.
yeah…if there was something I could DO, I would defintely do it. you’re a kind heart, quirk.
it seemed like a lesson the universe was pointing at me. also…sometimes what looks like bravery, is actually a reaction to grave injury…a good thing to remember if you’re attracted to bravery.
We had a northern flicker nest in our willow tree once – we got to see it feeding babies, although we couldn’t really see the babes..
As for this:
“sometimes compassion is stepping back and realizing it’s not your work to do. sometimes love is all you have to offer, and sometimes love is hands off”
Great words and absolutely true
I had to learn that awful lesson a few month ago, with an entire litter of kittens, whos mother died. (boar.) There was nothing the vet could do, either. I had to let nature take its course. It was terrible but I didn’t know what else to do but listen to them die and cry.
oh quirk, I’m so sorry!
In the words of the Great Bard of the Twentieth Century, “You got to know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em / Know when to walk away and know when to run.” Much as it pains me to quote Kenny Rogers, them’s are some true words. Hard lesson to learn, tho’. I still struggle with it daily.
true…
being your brother or sisters keeper is a damn near impossible job
that’s a cool-lookin’ bird. we got what they call “red piliated woodpeckers” around here, but they look just like the redheaded kind.
I adore you and am totally proud of you.
And therein is the entire philosophy of Al-Anon…
Releasing with love..
Breathe that clean air for me!!!!!
-M
Sometimes, it’s hard for me to grasp the fact that I can’t do everything for everyone in the world. It seems that as every moment passes, my inaction causes more harm, and yet, as you say, sometimes all it needs is a little distance to work it all out.
This is something I definitely need to learn.
…and also, sometimes what seems like a bad thing, may actually be What Needs To Happen.
Wise words.
I will do the very best I can not to become life-threateningly incapacitated in your presence
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Kidding. I won’t really do my best.
I forgot to add that I love that picture!!!!!
Also, yes, we got pie…what totally sucks is now that town’s evacuated and probably really close to being on fire…
-M
you so reminded me of Petey, my “pet” bird. I will have to go blog about it now.
c’est la vie.
please do come when the inevitable happens. we have this really huge berm in the backyard. but i think your mom would probably prefer her mother in a more traditional setting.
That’s a lovely delicate looking bird with elegant colours. I would love to see him in real life.
Your lesson in compassion is something to think over.
your last three paragraphs, here, are the epiphany… i can certainly relate.
They’re gorgeous ~ and I would have stopped to help because it’s in my blood, I’m a vet’s daughter and I can’t turn it off, even knowing the animal is going to die. I remember being out for a ride with some friends once and coming across a galah which was obviously in mortal trouble, and having to get off (we were riding bareback) and pick the bird up and get back on again (always a challenge) and then canter home along a main road, bareback, clutching a semi-conscious galah.. I must’ve looked a sight, that’s for sure ~ anyway, I handed the bird over to my mother, and it promptly died. Ungrateful bastard thing. But it was soooo pretty
BTW fabulous, you could never bum me out. Coming and visiting is so a highlight for me!
A few weeks ago I rehab’d this cute sparrow that my cat brought into the house. It had an injured wing but nothing broken….after feeding it for a few days and cleaning its wounds it improved and was flying around enough to convince me that it was ok to go back out. The night before its release date, for no explicable reason it refused to eat and passed during the night….It sucked that I had put so much energy into it and I was even happy to see the fruits of my labor, but shattered in the end.