December 5, 2004

• so, what do you know?  my sister went back to nyc today.  I didn’t talk about it much here on the off chance mom was reading.  back to normal, I guess.  I had a big relief feeling after us pulling off the sixty person surprise partay, and thanksgiving.  it does, however, leave a deadly lull.

  
  

  Paula called and we talked about the deadly lull feeling.  I mean I’m on AD’s so maybe I should be more pulled together?  still, it is december and if we’re not having killing/death thoughts perhaps we’re ahead of the game.  Paula brought up the subject of cults, that it was really too bad there weren’t any cults for us to join in this town, well, none that would suit us.  That was one thing I didn’t really mind about marriage.  I don’t mind being told what to do, you know, but it’s gotta be a BENEVOLENT leader.  so here are the words of wisdom that came out of that convo:  better a longing for a cult than a longing for death.

  
  

  Having just watched Stepford Wives, Paula wanted to know what I would want in a stepford husband.  the thought gave me chills.  huge goosebumps.  the thought had never occurred to me.  what an idea… I mean, it’s not that I’m averse to the concept of marriage, I really liked a lot about being married.  I just don’t think I could marry any humans or anything.  why they gotta be all up in my shit all the time?

  
  

  At that point Paula reiterated that she would NOT marry me.  I told her never say never.  one of us might need health insurance some day.  besides, eventually I’ll have a career and make decent money and everything.  waterfront house?  I bet she changes her tune THEN, boy howdy.

  
  

  She said she had to go; her phone was getting hot and she was pretty sure she was getting a brain tumour.

  
  

    the kids and crictor

  
  

    she was surprised

  
  

    I was saying I could feel her ribs

  
  

    yummy baby and hangover hair

  • 11:37 pm
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